Good News for Ugly Poor People

From: Rodale.com via MSN.com

Sexy, Rich People: You Should Feel Bad for Them
Study: Earning more money seemed to make recent graduates anxious and depressed, while those who had strong relationships were happiest.

By Leah Zerbe

Close your eyes and imagine that in the course of your life, you'll go on to make and save lots of money, become famous, and turn smokin' hot. Will it make you happy? Most people probably think so, but new research suggests otherwise. A study to be published this June in the Journal of Research in Personality found that recent college graduates who reported making the most money, obtaining more public recognition, and liking the way they looked were also more anxious, and showed more depressive symptoms, than other postgraduates in the study. "Not only were they not feeling better than they were at the start of the study, they were actually feeling worse," says Edward Deci, Ph.D., professor of psychology at the University of Rochester in New York.

The details: Researchers at the University of Rochester in New York studied 147 alumni during their second year after graduating from college. They used psychological surveys to learn about the young adults' feelings of satisfaction with life, self-esteem, anxiety, physical signs of stress, and their experience of positive and negative emotions. One year after graduation, and again 12 months later, researchers questioned the participants on values, asking them to rate how much they valued deep, enduring relationships and helping others improve their lives, versus being a wealthy person and achieving the look they've been after. The ones who reported making the most money, gaining recognition, and enjoying their images showed the most signs of anxiety and depression. The research was supported in part by a grant from the National Institute of Mental Health.

What it means: Why don't seemingly desirable goals like wealth and beauty pay off as expected? Perhaps because they distract people from more rewarding pursuits. "When you get too focused on the American dream — goals of being rich, famous, and beautiful — you start ignoring spending time in meaningful relationships, ignoring paying attention to yourself and growing as a human being, ignoring ways in which you could volunteer and give back to the community," explains Deci. Not that it's bad to be ambitious or to work hard to succeed. But this study implies that it's unrealistic to expect that kind of success to make you happy.

Here are some ways to find your own path to happiness:

Keep a perspective on beauty. Don't get too hung up on your appearance, because after all, beauty is pretty superficial, Deci says. And it may not be true that attractive people are more likely to get ahead. A study to be published this month in the Journal of Applied Psychology found that people with the highest intelligence scores earn more money during their lifetime, and report less financial strain, than people with high beauty scores.

Favor meaning over materialism. Trying to keep up with your friends or that cousin who seems to have everything going his way is a setup for disaster. "The important thing is being who you truly are. That you really accept yourself for who you are, and live your life accordingly in a full and meaningful way," says Deci. In his study, researchers found that those who had strong relationships (which requires accepting people for who they are, listening, and being there when they need you — not just when it's convenient) and volunteered in their community were happiest.